Feeling so amazed at how life leads us to where we are meant to be.
Multiple fb friends tagged me this am, as this video popped up in their memories from 5 years ago.
I can remember it like it was yesterday, though I never watch the replay myself – nor do I like to hear the song. Not because I do not love the song – of course I do. But the memory of this ride, the tangible feeling I experienced of Angels surrounding Silver and I as we galloped with no tack under that crowd at 100 days from the ‘wild’ – well, when I watch a replay – I never ‘feel’ it like I did that night, though we have done it many times since. Something shifted that night and I would rather hold that feeling in my heart than replay the memory to my mind.
There was a WILD I AM of PASSION placed in my heart then. A Passion to Compete. To show that a wild Mustang could in fact be ridden completely tackless at 100 days from the wild – even under a roaring crowd of a Makeover. There was something in me that wanted to prove something to the world. Prove that I was worthy. Prove that this Mustang was worthy. My PASSION craved to Prove itself. … and it did.
This year, as I watch the results of the current EMM go in the books, and I see that image of Silver and I tackless (above) posted all over their marketing material. I am boldly reminded that this WILD I AM of PASSION that once drove me, is no longer my driving force. There was a day that I could not imagine, not wanting to compete, but today is here. And I have NO desire to compete at all. That WILD I AM has left and in its place is a new one – a POWERFUL one – that drives me today.
Something happened that night, five years ago. Something shifted within as if my WILD I AMs shook hands and nodded their heads to one another as they traded off breathing me. The WILD I AM of PASSION moved out, and my WILD I AM of AUTHENTICITY moved IN.
This is what moves me today. Now, I am not at all saying that I was not Authentic 5 years ago – nor am I saying that if you desire to compete then you are not ‘authentic’. If that is what you take from this then you do not understand my definition of a WILD I AM …. Every WILD I AM is authentic in its own way – What I mean is – that AUTHENTICITY in Myself and Others is what I now CRAVE and what I feel deeply led to HELP others Uncover, with this herd of Wild Mustang Guides at my side.
And, gazing back on how it has all came to be and reliving the emotions I felt then and the emotions that I feel now. Well, it is just amazing to see how it has unfolded. And it gives me such excitement for the future. What will this journey look like when I reflect back on me today, from 5 years into the future?
My dreams now are to transform our Be LIFE Farm into a multifaceted retreat center. Where the Mustangs and I can help others on their path to uncover the WILD I AM within… and where we can partner with many other guides of many talents … to offer many types of retreats that will assist in the inner growth our collective is craving – even if they do not all know it – yet.
What will those dreams have manifested in the next 5 years?
What new WILD I AM will breath me then?
And what am I doing right now, that is leading me towards the goals of my Unseen Soul, goals that my consciousness cannot comprehend.
That tackless ride on Silver Lining became way more than a way to ‘prove’ myself to others. In hindsight, that was the tiniest benefit of that ride. No, that ride transformed me. I had never tangibly felt Angels before – never. But I did that night. That was the PROOF I was craving within – not to PROVE my talents to others, but to PROVE to ME that there is countless Unseen guidance and HELP in every step of my walk in this human vessel. My WILD I AM of PASSION led me to this PROOF, though I had no idea that was what I was looking for!
… But that is the beauty in it all. We think we know what we want as we move towards it. And that movement allows the Angels the momentum to roll us right along to where we truly want to go. Often times a place we never consciously knew we wanted.
It is just all deeply fascinating to me. To feel so strongly about what I think I want. To know it is imperative that I go after just that. To know that underneath it all – what I am truly here for and truly want is so much bigger than my human brain can explain to me.
So, I soak in the guidance of the #SoulSisters as they tell me to #TrustMore … and I step into the next phase of my walk – boldly, confidently with clear focused direction and at the same time the knowing that I am nothing but a puppet to the Unseen, the Angels, my WILD I AM that is guiding every footfall. Taking me exactly where I truly desire to go. Where-ever that may be.
In awe of it all.