***Update*** My Feelings moved so quickly after posting this, that I was led to post a follow up the day after – here is a LINK to Part 2)
It has been on my heart and mind to more consciously FEEL. To feel everything, the good, the bad, the happy, the sad. To FEEL it fully and let the Feel, flow through me.
Like a Wild Mustang. They truly FEEL every emotion that comes their way. Most of the time, that emotion is peaceful Grazing Mode Energy. But when it is not, because sometimes it is not. They still FEEL it just the same.
They FEEL it. They do not fight the feeling. The do not say – “I really should not be feeling afraid right now.” Or “My mom said to not be scared of this” Or “I am such a loser for feeling scared – AGAIN” …. no no no, they do none of that self-judgement over their fear that we humans are so great at. They just feel the Feeling.
But then, you know what they do? Once the Fear leaves – they go back to peaceful Grazing Mode Energy. Right Away. I mean RIGHT AWAY they go back. They ‘reset’ instantly. I have seen Mustangs in a huge fight and the second it is over – it is over. They go back to grazing. Grazing Mode Energy – at Peace. Simple.
They do not continue to replay the scary situation in their mind, they do not rehearse it repeatedly as if for some grand play they are preparing for, they do not judge themselves for feeling the fear that they felt. Actually, there is no longer any Fear to be felt, it is gone, because now they are fully in peaceful Grazing Mode Energy.
There is deep wisdom in their innate ability to FEEL every emotion. This truly allowing the Feel to move in, also allows it to move OUT.
It has been pretty easy for the past few days for me to conscious practice this, because, well let’s face it – I was feeling good 🙂
It is easy to ‘Feel the Feeling’ when it is a good one. But sure enough, the low has knocked on my door again. It is not a terrible low, just feeling a bit stuck in the desires of what I could be doing … if I was not pregnant.
You see, we were planning to bring the Mustangs and do an opening for the finals performance at the recent KY Extreme Mustang Makeover. I thought it would be such fun to re-create that image of my sweet Mustang, Silver Lining and I tack-less, galloping with the giant American Flag. You know – that image the EMM has used this year in their marketing ads. I just started feeling the disappointment of not being able to do it … but MHF/EMM staff agreed with me, that a tack-less flag presentation while I was sporting a substantial baby bump would not be the greatest idea!
Here is the ad …
To even breath mention of thinking of what I could be doing if I was not pregnant …. Oh I KNOW HOW BAD THAT SOUNDS!!! I DO want to be pregnant. I AM thrilled this gift of another magical child is entering our lives. I KNOW it sounds Horrible to admit that I ever have feelings of being ‘down’ in regards to my pregnancy. It makes me feel judgement towards myself to type these words .. and that is on top of the judgement I feel for feeling this way to begin with……
But it is an honest feeling. I know it will pass, but I also know if I swallow it and pretend as if I do not feel it, that it will lodge itself somewhere within me and fester until it breaks through the skin of another experience to re-ignite this same emotion.
Because – Feelings are determined to be Felt.
So, high time I practice what the Wild Mustangs Guide me to do – FEEL THIS. Do not shy away from it. Do not pity myself for it. Do not engage with it. Do not judge myself for it. Just simply feel it. Allow this feeling to move into me freely, so that it can move OUT of me just as freely – with the grace, ease and speed of the Wild Mustang Guides.