The night before my best friend began her transition to pure spirit, I had a dream.
We were in a car (my friend Kim and I) I was driving. We had gotten in some sort of wreck and the car was tossed up into the air. We were swirling around wildly. The car being tossed about in pure chaos, like a rag doll flying through the air in a million directions at once. We were fine in the car, but we both had the same emotion and realization – that this was not good.
“This was exactly what everyone thought would happen” I heard, “oh crap”
I remember recognizing we were in a state of chaos, and not knowing what would happen, but having a strong feeling whatever it was – was right. That we would be ok.
I recall saying out loud, “This will be ok”
We then began to fall to the ground, the car still chaotically being tossed like a rag doll around the air. It felt like we are on a plane approaching a landing strip. I remember anticipating the landing as if we might need to brace for it. I mean, we were traveling at lightening speed and the ground was coming fast.
I had my hands on the wheel and I remember feeling it was very important that I did not let go. But it was equally important that I did not hold the wheel too tight. I knew it was imperative that the wheels of the car be facing straight when we touched ground, so that we did not flip, but I had no way of knowing if they were straight or not while in the air. I remember the feeling that it was critical I hold the steering wheel solidly, yet softly – so that there was room for a little variation if need be in the landing. Much like when you run off the shoulder of the road and it is important you keep steering, but give yourself some wiggle room to flow with the shoulder so you then glide back on the road. I just knew a death grip on the wheel would wreck us. But no grip on the wheel was out of the question, I knew it was imperative I do my part.
As the car grew closer to the road we braced for landing, expecting quite the difficult impact, but knowing all would be well.
Then the car touched ground. It was amazingly soft. Instead of the wheels feeling like they were pounding on pavement, they felt smooth and just flowed.
I continued to hold the wheel in the same solid but soft manner and felt the most amazing alignment appear.
We just glided. While in the air, we were tossed in chaos, but now on the ground we were traveling straight as an arrow. Much like I feel when galloping a horse with no tack, my eyes fixed on where we are headed, and every part of us is hurdling in that pinpointed direction, yet with no real effort on my part. Just alignment.
As we flew down this road the car gradually slowed. It was like we had all this momentum and speed when tossed onto the road, but once our wheels touched ground we just glided to a stop.
Once the car glided to a full stop, we stepped out. We looked around at one another in pure amazement. The overwhelming emotion was, “holy freakin’ cow, we just did that! We nailed it. We pulled that off. Oh my goodness. We did it!”
Then people, tons of people just poured in around us. Some we knew, some we did not know, some we did not know we knew. They were just as amazed and impressed by our feat as we were. They told us how they could not believe we pulled that off. They said they had been watching the whole time, there had been cameras on us, it was all over the news and they were just blown away that we did this! I do not recall feeling guilty for feeling so accomplished from this feat in the dream – though as I was waking up and contemplating it, I did.
As we were standing there, beside our car, with people swarming us, feeling saturated in utter satisfaction and accomplishment and joy – I noticed something I had never noticed before …
There was a giant tractor trailer log truck up ahead of us. It was in line with our car, like it would be if you were behind a truck on the highway.
It dawned on me in the dream that we had been ‘back drafting’ off this very truck all along. That was why it was so easy to find alignment and travel straight once our wheels hit the ground, it was because the wind tunnel created by the momentum of this giant truck was pulling us along. This was why it was so important that I steer, yet not steer too ‘precisely’ – because in order to make this landing, we needed to let the suction of this truck pull us in. I needed to steer the car behind the suction, but I needed to give it (the suction behind the truck) the freedom to push us into the perfect spot. (If you have even been in a little car and driven behind a big truck you will know what I mean. If you are too far away you do not feel the suction at all, but when you start to get close, you feel it almost grabbing you, if you kind of let the car shift into the spot it wants to the wind coming off each side of the big truck will kind of toss you into this sweet spot directly behind the truck and you actually feel it pull you along. <— PLEASE do not get in a wreck trying this! If you are literally close enough to a big truck to back draft, you are likely too close to it to be safe. But this is the best analogy I can offer!
One more thing, it seemed we were going backwards the whole time.
That was the dream.
I had such an overwhelming feeling that I wanted to stay with my friend Kim that next night and not because of the dream. I had been wanting to stay that particular night for quite some time. At first some other family was scheduled to stay, but I was so thankful when the opportunity arose that I could in fact stay with her that night.
Before she went to sleep I told her the dream. I actually told her I wanted to tell her before she went to sleep. I remember wanting her to hear it while she was alert.
Once she went to sleep that night she began transitioning out of her body. I do not know when it happened and did not know it was happening at the time, but it must have begun at some point that night, because the nurse told me that it was in fact happening that next morning.
Once I was aware of this I took the opportunity to hold her hand and remind her of the dream. I told her it had been a wild ride, but we were about to touch ground and that it was not going to be near as rough as we might think. It was going to be so smooth, so effortless, so perfect. I told her I would be right there and to let Frances take her hand (our very close friend who transitioned only ~3 months prior) I told her she was the miracle, that she did it and it was time to fly. She moved her hand a lot in response to me. I know she heard and understood. Of course she knew without me telling her, but I felt blessed to have the opportunity to have that time with her.
Her family was all around and she was surrounded by love as she slipped out of her earthly body and transitioned to pure spirit over the next few hours.
It is hard to sum up this experience, I think the dream does it best.
Hold your steering wheel, but be sure to give it some wiggle room.